sew funny.

As I mentioned before I'm the MOH in the upcoming wedding of one of my best friends.

I'm also the MOH from hell. 

I haven't really helped with much of anything.  I don't really understand the need for a big expensive wedding.  I fully intend to elope, have an amazing honeymoon, and throw a kick ass party upon our return (that is if I ever find a man willing to put up with me).

Anyways, the dreaded bridesmaids dress.

I am not a fan of our dress.  The flipping 2-piece style, dark purple, one shoulder, weirdly fitting, characteristically expensive despite how generic it is, stereotypical bridesmaids dress.  Thanks David's Bridal.

They also have long skirts which she requested we have hemmed to tea-length or knee length.  To which after a couple of the girls got theirs hemmed, she realized she didn't want tea-length but decided to declare the length needed to be "mid-knee length."

I suppose it's a good thing I waited until 2 weeks prior to the wedding to go have mine hemmed, because I would have said tea-length just because it sounds prettier.

Realizing I was on a super short time frame, I found a local seamstress (sign on the lawn, yessir!), took down the number, and called her up.

Super thick accent (my guess is Russian, but I'm thinking I might just ask her when I return for my fitting - so stay tuned) and super-sweet.  Told me she'd see me the following morning. 

I drove to her home the following morning beofore work.  She showed me into her sewing room which had a gigantic photo of Marilyn Monroe, over which we bonded on our shared admiration of her.

Me and this lady we're gonna get along just swimmingly.

She left me alone, told me to change, and just to let her know when I was ready.

I changed and opened the door up.

She walked in and ohhh lovely, now when is your prom?

PROM?

Not only is school already out for summer but I'm 26.  I get this dress is foolish and unattractive, but PROM?!

Awesome.

I almost wish I had some desire for a stereotypical wedding just so I could put my friend in an equally unattractive, expensive dress.  Actually no, I don't.  I wouldn't want anyone's photo taken in a dress like this.

It's possible I'm being dramatic.  We'll see what the pictures turn out like.

risk taking.

 Moxy Mag hits a homerun with this article on fictional female risk takers.

While I had no idea who Holly Golightly was before this article, I'm loving the blurb they wrote for her.

Be your own proactive agent of change. Dislike the name you were given at birth? Strike an ‘x’ through it and assume a more whimsically appropriate moniker that better suits your personality. Feeling trapped by the small town circumstances you grew up in? Pack your bags, move to the big city, and surround yourself with the company you wish to keep. Go to great and controversial lengths to attain your goals. Be a spectacle and embrace it. Be the life of the party, always, and when you wake up with the inevitable hangover the next morning, stay glamorous. Always. And if the risks you take don’t work out as planned, pick up and move on to the next step. Never lose the ability to reinvent yourself.

I think it's time for my own reinvention.

a punch to the gut.

It's with a real heavy heart and jittery legs that can't stay still, that I'm writing this post.

In 2008 my cousin, who was 22 years old (and stunningly beautiful, authentic, captivating, and on her way to being wildly successful) died in a car crash.  She had had some drinks at the concert and was speeding on her way home with her boyfriend.  She was thrown from her car and found dead in a tree.  She was brought back, and hooked up to all kinds of machines for a few days before the decision was made, due to her being brain dead and having no chance of recovery, to pull the plug.  All our family was there and it was one of the most heart-wrenching experiences I've ever had to endure.

That's what makes this most recent situation even harder to deal with.

On Saturday morning I received a phone call, her younger brother, now 23, was speeding home from the bar with their older brother after several drinks, swerved his truck to avoid an oncoming car and caused a three car accident.  A woman in the first car he hit was killed.

He is a good kid.  He has a conscience, an amazing girlfriend, and a future.  He is one of those people you could call in the middle of night, and he would be there if you needed him.

I want to shake the bejesus out of him.  What in the HELL was he thinking.

He went through this.  He lost his sister.  His family has struggled through the last couple years, especially my aunt.

Another family now is going to be put through this devastation and the two teenage girls are left without their Mother.

The several eyewitnesses who saw him driving, said he was driving out of control.  Great, eyewitnesses....where was the phone call?  A DUI would be a zillion times better to deal with than this. 

I've had ex-bfs get mad at me before for calling on several what I thought were drunk drivers.  I'd rather call and have the situation checked out than losing someone or having someone else lose someone.

Trust me when I say I'm not blaming the eyewitnesses.  I'm not, but I do wish they would have called. 

It's weird to see your cousin on tv in a court house.  It's even worse to read the comments strangers write online to the newspaper articles.

I hate that my cousin made a decision that will affect him for the rest of his life.  I hate it so much for him I can't even stand it.  Like I said, he's a damn good kid who made one of the worst decisions he could have.  Quite honestly, I'm not sure how he's going to deal with this emotionally.  He knows what it feels like to be on the other side.

I hate that my aunt and uncle are having to go through this.

I hate so much that this other family is going to have to needlessly suffer.

I'm hoping like heck there is some other rationale as to the cause of this accident.  I hope this wasn't just a drunk driving accident.  And I realize that the only reason I'm hoping this, is because he is in fact my cousin, and I know him.  If this were a stranger, I'm sure I would feel differently.

I'm hoping like heck this is a crazy nightmare and I will wake up soon.

Cause it sure as hell was like a punch to the gut.

friday favorites.

I'm wiped from this week.  Lobster-fest took a toll on me.  And then being out until 2AM on Tuesday night was an additional kicker.  The endless rain and lack of sun didn't help much either.

Although, I'm pretty happy I went out on Tuesday.  My brother's girlfriend's brother is a friend of mine from high school that I hadn't seen since I can't remember when.  He's now one of those people that is ridiculously cool without an effort or a care in the world.  Fantasy-land commence.

Anyways, Friday.  Hells ya.

Heidi Klum, can I please have your closet?  Maybe your body too.  Also, if Leni could teach me that hair flipping method I'd be grateful.

I'm not sure how many of you have checked out the blogs I follow, but The Barefoot Foodie, is supremely hilarious.  She's also poignant and can totally hit the nail on the head.  As soon as she posts, I'm on there because I love all that she writes.  Her post from today on marriage while completely cracking me up, also made me think: If you write the script for your own romance, you'll almost never be disappointed.  Thought provoking and entirely true.  I'm a sucker for chick flicks and delightful romance novels but I also feel like I'm consistently comparing reality to the potential of what could be, based on those things.  However, I'm pretty sure I can't write a script....maybe I'll leave that to fate.

Who doesn't love a donut?  Now pass me a superdonut immediately so I can fill my face.  YUM.

So I posted previously about a lovely dress from asos for an upcoming rehearsal dinner.  Well I missed the boat on that one considering they sold out of my size.  Potential option to be considered?  I think so.

I like to consider my style kinda boho-chic, hippie-tomboy (yes I came up with that all on my own).  And when I track down a site suited to this style, I typically jump for joy, especially if it's affordable unique attire.  Check out Mexicali Blues.  I'm pretty sure I just became even more inefficient at work.

One of my bestest friends in the world is a fantastic and successful waitress (something I will be striving to be once I move to Florida).  I'm wondering if she would have some of the same dating tips.

Bing gave me my final picture to post.  It's of sunset over the Pacific from the International Space Station, credit given to NASA.  Pretty freaking amazing.

Have a lovely weekend - I'll be back in gear next week, promise.

lobster-fest.

Alcohol is clearly the best solution out there.

And I also stuck to my guns and didn't blog all sorts of hung-over.  So what if my hang-over lasted a couple of days and I posted nothing.

Lobster-fest: backyard all you can eat lobster boiling extravaganza with lots of booze, volleyball, people, and beirut.  And exactly what I needed to kick my funk in the face.

I wore my hot pink sayiwon't tee which encouraged lots of shouting in my tipsy stupor and pair of cut offs, which were suprisingly short. 

I drank my face off and played lots of volleyball (my body is still crying in pain, especially my legs which caused me to fall and slide and bump into others).  And then I ate steak, wrapped in bacon.  I don't even like steak.

After approximately 8 hours of shouting, laughing, volleyball, and drinking....me and a few others headed to the bar.  This was after some random dude asked me to marry him, possibly I said yes?  Well, he went to the bar too.

At the bar there was some dancing and a lot of people all in my personal space.  I had to break free, so I kept running to the outside deck to shout about men being hyenas or something equally as illuminating.

Thankfully as I was leaving the bar and several people were shouting "I say you won't run up that hill totally nude" (which when someone suggests you won't, especially when you are wearing a tee-shirt saying I will you have to carefully consider these suggestions) a friend rolled up in her car and told me to jump in the passenger seat.  Best decision I made all night.  No nudity, thank you very much. 

Well....minus popping a squat in the bar parking lot.  That was embarassing as a car pulled up and their high beams caught me full on.

Anyways.... 

 

So as I finally recovered from an epic, booze-filled 12 hours, I made plans to head to the bar tonight.  My brother's girlfriend is turning 21. 

Damn it, bring on the alcohol.

friday favorites.

Alright, so I was up and at 'em this morning.  Went for a walk with my dog after my breakfast and got caught in a rain storm 2 miles away from my house. 

Fear not, I did not let some rain dampen my spirits.  I will push forth with this positive attitude.

I don't watch hockey or any other sport, for that matter.  But I still feel inclined to post this picture because a team that accomplishes something like winning the Stanley Cup, deserves recognition.

So I currently have feather hair extensions in my hair.  And I am OBSESSED, I love them.  It's just something a little different that's not that noticeable but still cool.  My sister mentioned that the new up-and-coming thing was tinsel hair extensions.  WHAT?!  That sounded kind of tacky to me.  Then, as we went to a new salon to get our feathers changed out, I realized the hair dresser had tinsel extensions in her hair.  NOT TACKY AT ALL.  Supremely cool.  Noticeable only when the light hit her hair, so it like glistened.  It was amazing.  I'm not sure I could pull off this trend on a day-to-day basis, but it might be something to consider for an extremely fantabulous night out.  I looked up some photos online so you can get the gist of what this looks like.

Alright, so wacky unusual summer events.  Clearly this is something to be explored.  After doing just that I found an article on the top 10 wacky summer events.  I must say the Summer Redneck Games looks hilarious and totally fun.  I would definitely skip the bobbing for pigs feet (blech!) but the rest of it, well a little dirt never hurt.

Jake Owen.  Thank you.  I LOVE it.

Even though I'm single and reading about couples and their happiness can make me want to pull out my hair and scream, I actually enjoyed skimming through what guys find sexy.

I saw the movie Bridesmaids a couple of weeks ago and loved it.  Mind you, the lead character, well her name more or less rhymes with my name.  The similarities don't stop there.  I'm a mess just like she is.  And I'm pretty certain I'm a shitty MOH.  Then I found a site designated to helping MOH's!  Now about that damn toast....

A National Geographic Photo of the Day pick by me.  This one was taken by Christian Vizl while Cave Diving in the Yucatan Peninsula.  Wow.

And finally, Bing came through with another stunner.  This one is of Thor's Well, on the Oregon Coast taken by Chris Mullins.  I've been drooling to for an Oregon trip anyways, and I think that trip just became even more necessary.

My work day ended early, and one of the guys in the kitchen snuck some cake into a take-out container for me.  Obviously filled my face on the drive home.  Lovely completion to my Friday!

post fantasy meets reality funk.

I apologize for the lack of posts.  But seeing as I didn't end up running off into the sunset with a new boyfriend on one arm and my dog on the other side, I was all sorts of jaded this week.

Jaded.  Or maybe it's just PMS.

But either way, after working with my boss on a couple of assignments today, he was very concerned.  He wanted to know what was up and why I was so volatile.

VOLATILE.

When your boss asks why you are so volatile, you know you are likely making some poor choices at the work place.

My plan is to wake up on the right side of the love seat (I don't sleep in a bed, because my bed is in the loft, and I don't want to deal with waking up at 3AM to pee, and falling down the ladder....I also don't want to sleep that far away from my dog seeing as he can't get his 80lbs up a ladder) tomorrow morning, post my friday favorites, and kick this funk in the face and get on with my life.

I also intend to drink lots and be all sorts of ridiculous on Saturday.  I'm very excited and 100% convinced that will help me get my shit back together.

fantasy-land.

I threw myself a pity party (I sulked and discarded any existing confidence) on Saturday. 

What set this party in action?  The fact that something failed to happen with my most recent pseudo-boyfriend.

Ridiculous, I know.

But after several failed attempts at finding a nice guy, I allowed myself to get excited about the potential of something, anything.

One of my best friends pointed out that I had a pity party over something that I day-dreamed up.

Realistically, I didn't even know this guy.  Not one thing about him (beyond what I found out through stalking).  Yet, I allowed myself to get caught up in the possibility and created a fantasy-land in my head where we clearly were meant to be.

Fantasy-land is supposed to be a happy place.

When the real world doesn't turn out like your happy place, it's not supposed to affect your actual mood in a negative way. 

Fantasy-land is supposed to be an escape from the negativity of reality. 

Trust me, I know that.  I live the majority of my life with my head in the clouds. 

Now I just need to remember that just because I create something in my mind, it doesn't mean it will happen in real life.

I need to make things happen not just let my mind run away with itself.

Sigh, back to the clouds.

friday favorites.

Every Friday I browse through a week's worth of National Geographic's Photo of the Day photos.  While I enjoy the majority of the pictures, occasionally one of them will stop me in my tracks.  This photo, taken by Patrice Carlton, in Thailand, did just that, I mean seriously, how flipping cool.

So, I'm kind of new to the wine scene.  Previously I would drink Arbor Mist Blackberry Merlot and call it good.  Then I became hooked on Barefoot Moscato.  When I venture beyond my safe bets, I typically select something based on the name or what the bottle label looks like.  When I stumbled across this article, I was instantly intrigued.  Liquor store, here I come!

I like how Michelle Obama has transformed the first lady stereotype.  She's one of the most recognizable people in the world but yet still manages to maintain some pretty down to earth elements in her life.  Reading about her rebel status made me appreciate this that much more.

Startracks on the People website keeps me in touch with the celebrity world and their attire.  I'm an Emma Watson fan in general and I have to say this dress choice was FANTASTIC.  Kudos, Emma.

I don't watch much tv.  If the tv is on, typically it's on HGTV for the sole purpose of providing me with some background noise.  I will admit that I watch The Bachlorette (I know, I know, but I can't help it!) on Monday nights and thank goodness I do or I would have missed seeing the preview for this new show called Expedition Impossible.  Umm, hi can I PLEASE be on this show!  Definitely planning on tuning in for the series premiere on June 23rd.

And finally, while I enjoyed watching the Royal Wedding and hearing about the romance of Prince William and Kate Middleton, I really held off hopping on the bandwagon of all her fashion choices.  I mean she's definitely gorgeous and made some really great choices but nothing that really stuck with me.  Until now.  This dress is beautiful.  Kinda makes me wish I had a reason to be that dazzled up.

How is it possible I have not heard of Motopony until this morning?!  Love this song.  You NEED to give it a listen.

Side note: my new boyfriend made no moves today.  Disappointing....

polar bears weigh enough.

To break the ice.

So I did it.

I walked down to the room where the inservice is taking place (while everyone was out on a break) to talk to my friend and pass on an important piece of information (lunch was an hour early, so what if I could have made a phone call!).  After I passed that on, I remained in the room chatting with him and one other new staff for a few minutes.

And then....my pretend boyfriend returned.  Score!

Heyy, was that you the other night at the show?

Yea, I was there.

Oh, alright, yea I totally thought it was you but wasn't really sure so I didn't say anything.

Yea, I was actually telling him that I thought I had seen you there.

My friend than chimed in with, this was the girl you were telling me was "middle-aged?"

WHAT, middle-aged?  HELLO, I am not middle-aged

The conversation then turned to friendly banter which I thought went well.  A few minutes later I left the room before everyone else returned.

Later in the afternoon I went down to the room (while everyone was on a lunch break) to talk to my friend.  The other guy that was in the room during the initial conversation was there too.

This other guy informed me that my boyfriend wasn't back yet.

Umm, excuuuse me?!

I immediately turned to my friend and yelled at him for opening his flipping big mouth!

But apparently, he hadn't said anything.

The fact that my face was beat red and I was clearly all sorts of flustered had said it all and even better: it has become a joke among all the other new staff.

So much for subtlety.

Whatever, considering I made a bit of a fool of myself, the ball is in his court.

making a difference.

I'm a terrible public speaker.  I get all sorts of nervous, my armpits start to sweat, I say um & like a lot, and I talk really fast. 

In college I would have panic attacks if I spoke in front of the class.  I generally requested extended writing assignments in order to avoid presentations alltogether.

So when I got invited to go speak at a local middle school for career day, I hesitantly (with good reason!) agreed.

The only reason I agreed was because my dog would be with me. 

After adopting my dog, and realizing how amazing he truly was, I spent a lot of time and effort working with him.  And this past winter we became a certified pet partner team through Delta Society.

This means that I can bring him into hospitals, nursing homes, libraries, schools, etc. and visit with patients or residents and brighten their day.  I LOVE being able to do this.  Volunteering is hugely important to me, and to be able to volunteer WITH my dog; well talk about an incredible opportunity.

So we arrived at the middle school yesterday and were set up in a classroom with immediate outdoor access.  I was then told that I would have 5 groups, each for about 25 minutes, and there would be one break.

The first presentation I gave was pretty sloppy.  I hadn't really prepared, so I just wung (is that a word?) it.  Combine that with a lot of nerves, and let me say speedy talker not making much sense.

Realistically, the kids didn't really care.  My dog stole the show.

After that first presentation, I totally found my groove.  Honestly, my nerves disappeared.  I spoke in chronological order about his training, I made sense, and gave them information on my dog.  One of the teachers even told me that if we were to ask the kids, they would say that my presentation was their favorite.  Talk about a necessary confidence booster.

I think it was because I was talking about something I was truly passionate about, that I was able to pull it together. 

Or maybe it was because my dog provided me with some comfort and confidence.  He makes a difference when we visit others, but he also makes a difference in my life.

His facebook page also became an instant hit with the students.  Seriously, we scored like 30 likes in a matter of minutes once school was out.

Pretty epic.

big girl pants.

I need to stop being a flipping chicken.

Alright, so this past week there was an in-service group (training for newly hired staff that lasts about 2 weeks).  This training takes place in the downstairs of the building I work in.  Obviously this means I get prime viewing of the new staff.

Well wouldn't you know there is a total hottie in the group.

For the first few days of last week, every single time they got a break from training, I would saunter over to another building and flaunt my non-existant ass in hopes he would take notice. 

I also have access to each staff members information (and one of my good friends happens to be the in-service facilitator), so I asked to find out his name.  Got it, no problem.  My co-worker (the in-service facilitator) mentioned that he thinks he is younger than me.  Alright, so what....as long as it's not much younger, no biggie.

On Friday morning I got access to his license (yah, I can occasionally be a creep), and wouldn't you know it but he is actually the same age as me, born in the same month and everything.  Obviously, this is a good sign.

Considering everyone and their Mom has a facebook these days, I absolutely took to a search of his name.  Cripes, we have 6 friends in common! 

THIS IS FATE.  He obviously needs to be my new boyfriend.

On Friday afternoon, my co-worker asked the group if anyone had any plans for the weekend.  My new eye-candy responded that he was going to a small near-by bar to see a really decent local band play.

Could this go any smoother, honestly?

So I message one of the mutual friends, a really cool girl, who would semi-understand that I'm not a complete creepster (just a minor one) and ask for the low-down on this guy.  Response: really cool guy, you should totally get to know him, I think you would get along really well.

New Saturday evening plan: need to find a wingman to accompany me to this total townie bar to stage a random, impromptu run-in.

So, I convince my sister and one of my friends that this is clearly a good game plan and that they definitely want in.

We roll up to this small-time dive bar, walk in, order some drinks (get stared at by all the locals because we clearly are the outsiders), and then the crowd parts and wouldn't you know it, my boy is there.

I make a quick trip to the bathroom, just to confirm that it is in fact him (and hope that he sees me).  While in the bathroom I meet a middle-aged lady who was just getting down on the dancefloor.  Mind you, she is taking her inhaler after her one dance.  I totally made her feel fine about it though, I explained that it makes sense she would need it, she was really going at it.

The rest of the evening was spent chit-chatting with some people in the bar (randomly my sister actually knew a few friends there) and ordering new rounds of drinks.  Then we hit up photo-hunt.  If you've ever played photo-hunt when drinking, you know it's exceptionally addicting.

My sister ends up getting my boys attention and he joins us for a photo-hunt round.  My sister clams up so that I can strike up conversation.  What do I do you ask?  PLAY PHOTO-HUNT.  I do not say a word to him.  So he walks off.

I head home a total failure with my seemingly bomb-proof plan.

New game plan.  This morning when I see him at work (and I intentionally dressed in a favorite outfit), I'll say something like, "Heyy, were you at that show on Saturday night?  I thought it might have been you, but I wasn't sure."  There-by leading into further conversation.

My co-worker reports back first thing (he sees the group before I get in) that this guy mentioned he thought he saw me at the show.

Ok, so he did take notice.  Not a complete fail.  Now, I just need to start-up this conversation.

Wouldn't you know it, he went home sick today.

Fail x2.

My co-worker did inform that he described me as attractive.

Maybe not all has been lost.

I only have 3 days left of him being in this building for training.  Then he switches to an overnight shift.

I need to put on my big girl pants and be bold.

friday favorites.

I've decided that each Friday I'll post some of my favorite things I've discovered over the course of the week.  Enjoy!

I have a rehearsal dinner coming up for one of my BFs, and while initially I was gonna bland out my style so as not to upstage her plain jane approach to style (I'm the MOH, so I have to be in front too), I found this dress while browsing and well....blanding out might not be the approach I go for.  A find like this is too amazing:

Sigh, Marilyn Monroe....can you ever go wrong when she's involved?  Take a peek at some of her well known, and not as well known, quotes: <3 Marilyn.

I'm an animal lover (obv considering I have the most amazing dog ever who seems to make animal friends EVERYWHERE).  I stumbled upon these animal adventures and I'm pretty sure I want to sign up for all of them.  Considering I'm contemplating a move to Florida this fall (further discussion in a future post)....I'm pretty sure horse surfing is going to be a must do, immediately.

Browsed through blogs of note this week, and came across turnonthebrightlightss.  Trust me when I say you should check it out, it's really fantastic.

Each day when I get to work, I always check bing to see what the background photo is and read the 4 interesting facts about whatever it is.   On Thursday it was a picture from Latvia:

My romantic side swooned at this whole notion of affixing a padlock to a bridge with your sweetheart after tying the knot.  Hm, if only....

Finally, I photo of mine from a recent trip to Nicaragua.  It makes me smile and remember the awesomeness of it all. 

tornados and turtles.

Yesterday was insane but yet it had started pretty simply.

First I woke up (I suppose that goes without saying) and went to give my dog his heartworm medication (1st of the month, every month!).  Welp, crap.  The box was empty, go figure.  I decided that I would call my vet, pay for one dose since he has his annual appointment this month anyways, and have my sister pick it up on her way home from work since she drives right past.  Easy peasy.

It was miserably muggy & buggy, but I still went for a walk with my dog, got ready for work, and off I went. 

On a side note, I've been rather un-motivated at work this week.  Last week, I actually worked pretty hard and got a number of tasks completed.  This week, totally different story.  I've had it with the desk job crap.

Anyways, at approximately 3:45PM I received a phone call that a tornado watch was in effect and that severe thunderstorms were rolling through.  So I notified the appropriate individuals at work so that students were returned inside and that staff were aware about the upcoming weather.

Suddenly the weather got insane and there were actual reports of tornados!  I was prepared to leave work in the midst of the storm to go get my dog (not a fan of thunder) and make sure we were both safe in my landlord's basement on the chance of a tornado ripping through.  My boss told me this was the worst idea he had ever heard and that I was going to stay put until it passed through.  I called my landlady, who was thankfully home, she went up to my apartment (we more or less have a complete open door policy, her and her husband are more like a second set of parents to me), and brought my dog into her house for me.

I then got a phone call from my sister reporting that the weather was horrendous, she was driving through a huge storm, and wasn't going to risk her life to stop at the vet to pick up my dogs' heartworm medication.  Ok.  Fine.  I will go myself after work. 

The storm that was over-head at work passed.  I left, went home to feed my dog some dinner, and then bring him along for the 40 minute ride to the vet (yes, it's that long of a ride....now see why I asked my sister to pick it up on her way home??).

New weather alerts suggested an additional tornado watch and severe storms headed our way once more.

Well, to hell with it.  I still need heartworm medication for my dog.

So I set off to drive from clear weather in my town to the midst of the storm brewing.  Win.

Of course 2 miles from my house there is a huge turtle (think larger than a basketball size, just not blown up into a ball shape) in the middle of the road.  Right where the road bends, so anyone speeding down the road would hit him. 

I pull over my car and grab a big stick off the side of the road.  I put the stick near his face (I'm not a turtle identifier, so I needed to see if he was a snapper) and the turtle latched on and broke off the end of the stick!  Fantastic, a pissed off snapper, just what I wanted to move on my way to the vet in the middle of a tornado watch.

So I use this long stick to nudge him along.  He grabbed it in the middle and the flippin thing snaps into two pieces.  Clearly I chose a durable stick option.  Everything was soaking wet and it was starting raining again.  I thought to myself "I'll be damned if I have to trek around finding a durable stick to move this ungrateful beast."  So I used the two disintegrating stick pieces to nudge him along.  Only now he decides he's had it with me and takes off beneath my car.  Seriously you ingrate, WTF.

I get myself on the ground and re-position him so that I can pull my car forward without hitting him.  Success on that end.  I then nudge him further to the side of the road into a small stream.  Success, again!

Travel continues.

From the turtle moving location until approximately 15 minutes later, I enter what I call a "no phone zone."  In other words, no cell service area.

Once out of the no phone zone, I have 2 voicemails.  No one calls me, let alone leaves me messages.

I call my voicemail.  First message is from one of my friends' fiance, he has an injured baby bird and he needs some assistance.  Second message is from my friend asking me to help her fiance.

Ok, so I do have several local animal control people's cell phone numbers on speed dial, and the closest wildlife clinic emergency animal center on my phone too....but I'm no Doctor Doolittle.

However, last year, when I let my dog out after work.  He ran outside and put his nose to the ground and at the end of it was a baby bird that couldn't fly.  Now, he didn't do anything to the baby bird, just wanted to be near it (as is usually the case with animals he meets).  I called a local animal control lady that I've spoken to on several occasions for the best course of action. 

It wasn't a baby.  It was a fledgling.  A fledging is a bird at that in-between phase where it's tries to fly, but can't successfully yet, so it often ends up on the ground.

She told me to find the tree with the nest and to re-locate the bird to beneath it, and the Mother would tend to it.  So I grabbed a ladder (mind you I'm in a knee immobilizer-3rd soccer injury aftermath, and a skirt) and I'm climbing up and down the ladder until I located where the nest was.  Then I grabbed my dog's frisbee, slipped the bird onto it, and relocated him.  Went inside and what do you know the bird was fine.

My guess was that this baby bird my friends' fiance was calling about, was a fledgling.  So I called him back to give him the low-down.

He tells me he found it underneath a tree, when he got close the mother was going nuts, but that he thought it was hurt so he caught it and put it in a box and has it inside.

Damn you no phone zone!  This could have been resolved before putting this fledging through this stress!

I ask if the bird has any apparent injuries.  No.  I ask if it appears healthy.  Well yeah, it just couldn't fly.  I ask if he knows where the nest is.  Yeah, the Mother is still out there.

I tell him he needs to go put it back beneath the tree with the nest in it.  I inform him that even if the bird was injured, it's really difficult to find a center that will take general population birds in.  And that I was nearly positive that this was a fledgling, and would be taken care of.

His response: but I just fertilized the lawn.  Me: Well, since it was already on the ground, it's likely it already had contact with the fertilizer.  Him:  well you see I caught it and then fertilized.

WTF, who does that?!

I tell him he needs to get the healthy fledgling outside, near the nest tree, and in a location of minimal or no fertilizer.  He said he would take a picture after release and call me back.

He called me back.  I couldn't get a picture, the second I released him, he took off! 

Phew, animal situation taken care of.

My phone rings again, it's my sister.  I can't believe you are risking your own life for your dog's heartworm.  Well yes, since he is on a monthly cycle, he needs it.  If there appears to be bad weather, I will turn around or find somewhere to go.

I arrive at the vet, get his heartworm, return to the car, and give him the tablet.  He spits it out and it falls underneath the passenger seat.  Of course it does.

As I'm digging around trying to find that gosh darn thing, I mutter to myself: I can't believe I risked life and limb for this, and you are spitting it out....dang nabbit.  Found it, decided to wait for a more appropriate time to give it to him.

On the way home, I decided since I could see the storm in the distance I had time for a quick jog down a trail.  So I did.  There was some pretty fierce lighting going on.

But I found 2 4-leaf clovers.  The first of 2011, so that was a positive thing.

I got back to my car and headed for home.

As I arrived home, I start to hear about more of the devastation of the tornados.  (Here is a brief article on them: MA tornados).  All the power to those dealing with the aftermath and I'm hoping they can keep their spirits up and regroup.

Maybe it wasn't the best idea for me to be traveling around during that time frame.  Although, I guess I successfully moved a snapping turtle, picked up heartworm, went for a jog, and found 2 4-leaf clovers all during a tornado warning.

Suddenly the sky started lighting up around the time it generally gets dark.  By lighting up I mean, the sky was like neon green and then yellow.  Totally freaky. 

I made my dog stay inside, turned on HGTV, and texted a friend asking him to let me know if a tornado was headed my way so I could head into my landpeople's basement.  Thankfully, the storm skirted around us.  Although it did hit other spots.

This morning after my walk while I was getting ready for work, my landlady came over.  Thankfully she yelled up the stairs first because it would have been mighty awkward had she walked right up (I had the door propped completely open to let the breeze in) and found me standing there in my underwear and over-sized tee-shirt (I like to strip out of my tick clothes immediately after a walk!). 

But she told me if I ever get nervous about the weather, I can just sleep over their house in their guest bedroom.

Like I said, second set of parents.  I love having them there.